The Childfree Horse

No children to stop me from running around the beach like the stalion that I am

I have read a number of articles from the childfree community, I've even followed the hashtags on twitter to see what they say.  To be fair, many of their arguments are valid.  Here is a really popular blog called Childfreedom.  A lot of the childfree argument is about doing the world a favor by not contributing anymore people to our already overpopulated, overpolluted and resource strained world.  Another factor that's huge in the argument?  MONEY.  Think of how much better financially you would be doing if you didn't have to fork it all over for after school sports, summer camps and daycare.  And last but certainly not least... TIME.  What parent that you know wouldn't love more time with their partner or for themselves for that matter?  Here is a great article by a psychologist loving her childfree life that pretty much sums it up.

While I've always considered myself different from the crowd, a bit of a misfit, someone who scoffs in the face of normal conventional living (I mean seriously I shoud've been raised in a nude commune with home schooling and travel based education),  on this topic unfortunately I find my feelings on the subject following the sheep.  I want a baby and I want one before I'm 35.  I don't give a shit about having enough money or being exhausted or the fact that it could be a strain on my social life.  I feel like I want to focus on another little creature that I help create and comes out of my tummy.  That sounds so conventional and boring, so UNLIKE ME! 

I think my husband can really identify with these people in a strong way according the some of the arguments he's given me about why he has doubts about having kids, and if you read about our problem you'll see why this is a tough situation for us.  I however can't feel like them nor envision my life like theirs.  I understand them and there is secretly a part of me that wishes I could climb on that childfree horse and ride off into the sunset with my husband so we could live unconventionally ever after.  But somehow I just can't...